I've always thought that dating someone because we shared values/lifestyles was always more important than skin color so being down with the "swirl" was never a problem (although I've definitely had the "omg, he's gorgeous blonde perfection, will he be interested in black girls? oh no!" still kicking myself for that one or "asian guys don't like black girls, he won't be interested" so this book is great to help people get over some of that anxiety).
Fellow blogger Christelyn of BeyondBlackWhite.com has written the book "Swirling: How to Date, Mate, and Relate - Mixing Race, Culture, and Creed" and I just wanted to review it here because I quite liked it!
What I enjoyed about the book is that it's very conversational yet manages to bring forth pretty much all major points that one would consider when dating outside of their race:
- what happens when families are against it
- how to date folks from a vastly different culture
- flirting cues from people of other cultures
- how to deal with the stares/whispers
- ideas on where to meet quality guys
- sex stereotypes and how to stop psyching yourself out
- the medias impact on beauty standards and perceptions
and just other really interesting topics. You walk away with things to think about and a checklist of ideas for finding love (or letting it find you).
There are two authors, Christelyn and Janice Rhoshalle Littlejohn , from different dating backgrounds: Christelyn is happily married longterm with children while Janice is single and out there mingling. This way, we get the perspectives from both sides of the coin!
It is mostly written with black American women in mind because it does delve into the psychology of things that we've been told to uphold by the black community in America: the "nothing but a brotha" mindset, issues of being "true" to the community while dating for character and quality (i.e. you aren't a race traitor for dating nonblack men), shrugging off the "strong black woman" persona that has been shoved on many black women and steals the feminity/vulnerability, things of that nature.
Even though the topics are important, as I stated previously it is written in a very conversational and easy to read format with lots of jokes. I found myself giggling in many bits at the one liners and was definitely entertained.
The book was well done and I feel that it could be a helpful fun addition to many women's libraries.
It can be purchased at Amazon: Swirling